Rediscovering Your Authentic Self: A Journey for Late-Diagnosed Autistic Women
Rediscovering Your Authentic Self: A Journey for Late-Diagnosed Autistic Women
Many women come to an autism diagnosis later in life, often after years of feeling different, misunderstood, or exhausted from “masking” their true selves. If you find yourself wondering whether autism might explain your experiences, know that you’re not alone and that diagnosis can be a powerful step toward rediscovering your authentic self.
Why Are So Many Women Diagnosed Later?
For decades, autism research and diagnostic criteria were based largely on studies of boys and men, leading many autistic girls and women to be overlooked. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), autism can look different in women, who often develop compensatory social strategies that mask traits like sensory sensitivities or social overwhelm. This “camouflaging” may help women appear to fit in, but it often comes at a personal cost leaving many feelings burnt out, anxious, or unsure of who they really are.
As Julia Bascom, Executive Director of the Autistic Self Advocacy Network (ASAN), has said, “The system wasn’t built for how autism shows up in women and nonbinary people.” Many women discover their neurodivergence not through childhood interventions, but through years of quietly struggling, adapting, and wondering what they’ve been missing.
What Does Late Diagnosis Mean for You?
Receiving an autism diagnosis as an adult can bring a deep sense of clarity and relief. For many, it marks a turning point—a moment of recognition and self-understanding after years of feeling “off” without knowing why. Author and advocate Liane Holliday Willey, who was diagnosed as an adult, describes this process as “finally putting a name to the invisible wall” she’d felt her whole life. Diagnosis gave her a framework to reinterpret her past with more compassion and context.
Rediscovering your authentic self might involve:
Letting go of the pressure to “perform” neurotypical behaviors
Embracing your unique sensory and emotional experiences
Connecting with others who understand and share similar experiences
Developing self-compassion and building new strategies that work for you
Why Consider an Autism Assessment as an Adult Woman?
An autism assessment goes beyond simply receiving a diagnosis, it’s about gaining insight into how your mind works and unlocking access to support tailored to your unique needs. As Dr. Temple Grandin, a renowned autism advocate and scientist, explains, “Autism is not a tragedy. Ignorance is the tragedy.” Understanding yourself better through assessment can help end the frustration of trying to fit into environments that weren’t designed with you in mind.
Getting an assessment can provide clarity, self-compassion, and strategies to navigate life more comfortably, while helping you thrive on your own terms.
Some benefits of seeking an assessment may include:
Reframing your life experiences with clarity and understanding.
Gaining validation for your experiences.
Accessing resources and accommodations that align with your needs.
Building self-compassion by connecting the dots of your life experiences.
Creating a roadmap for how to better support yourself moving forward.
Taking the First Step: Exploring Your Neurodivergence
If you’re curious about autism but not sure whether you want a diagnosis, that’s okay. Therapy can offer a supportive space to explore your questions and begin understanding your neurodivergent traits more deeply. This exploration can be healing, whether you pursue a formal assessment.
If you feel ready to explore how I can support you, or if you have any questions about therapy and the process, please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me. I’m here to listen and help you take the next step on your journey.
Final Thoughts
Late diagnosis isn’t about discovering what’s “wrong” with you, it’s about coming home to yourself. It’s about peeling away the layers of masking and misunderstanding to find the strengths, sensitivities, and truths that have been there all along.
Your neurodivergence isn’t a problem to fix. It’s a way of being that deserves understanding, respect, and support. If you’re ready to begin that journey, you don’t have to do it alone.
